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What To Do If You’re A Verbal Processor

Verbal Processor

Have you ever found yourself wondering why some individuals can’t resist vocalizing every thought that crosses their minds? Welcome to the fascinating world of verbal processors! In this journey, we’re not just scratching the surface but delving deep into the lively realm of verbal processing, or as I like to affectionately call it, “thinking out loud.”

Internal Processing vs. External Processing: The Brain’s Railroad Tracks

Let’s imagine your brain is like a super-fast train, zooming through lots of different thoughts and ideas. Think of two kinds of conductors steering this train – one group likes to keep things quiet in their heads (internal processors), and the other group loves talking about their thoughts out loud (external processors or verbal processors).

These two types are important for how our minds work, but they’re a bit like trains going in different directions. If you’re in a relationship with someone who thinks differently, it might feel like the train tracks lead to nowhere. Let’s look closer at the ones who like to share their thoughts outside of their heads.

Some people are like quiet engineers in the train, keeping their thoughts hidden away. They think carefully before sharing their ideas, like they’re going through secret tunnels in their minds. These are the internal processors.

Then there are the talkative conductors, the verbal processors. They’re like explorers laying down tracks as they go, making their thoughts visible for everyone to see. It’s like they have a see-through bubble above their train, showing all their twists, turns, and ideas in real-time.

In relationships, especially when different types of thinkers are involved, understanding these two ways of processing thoughts is super important. If you don’t get it, it might feel like a confusing network of tracks going nowhere. The quiet thinkers may seem mysterious, hiding their thoughts like buried treasure. The talkative ones might seem a bit much, with all their thoughts out in the open.

But here’s the cool part – both ways of thinking are important. The quiet thinkers make sure to think deeply and carefully before sharing their ideas, like building strong tracks in their secret tunnels. The talkative thinkers make a dynamic network, sharing their journey as they go, like laying tracks through an open landscape.

So, it’s not about making everyone think the same way. It’s about understanding and appreciating how each person’s mind works. It’s like a dance of trains, each with its own rhythm and purpose, creating a cool mix of thoughts that, when we understand it, can make our journey through ideas more fun and friendly.

GPS for the Brain: The Benefits of Being a Verbal Processor

Talking to someone who shares their thoughts a lot is like having a special seat to watch how their brain works. Imagine you’re at a circus, and this person’s thoughts are like acrobats doing flips and jumps. You get to see how they decide things, like a carefully planned show. It’s like having a backstage pass to the best show ever – the amazing and colorful show of their mind.

When people share their thoughts a lot, it’s like they have a clear window to their brain. This is great because you always know what they’re thinking, how they made up their mind, and the interesting path they took to get there. It’s almost like having a GPS for their brain – a tool that helps guide you through their thoughts, step by step, idea by idea, all in real-time. This way, you don’t have to guess what they’re thinking, and everything becomes clear and easy to understand.

The Tricky Part: Misunderstanding the Verbal Processor

If you’re not used to recognizing that you’re dealing with a verbal processor, things can get a tad tricky. Picture this scenario: you enthusiastically present an idea, and instead of receiving a round of applause, you’re met with a series of “what-ifs” and “buts” from your verbal processor friend. Before you know it, it feels like they’re raining on your parade.

The crucial point to grasp here is that they’re not attempting to be the raincloud at your sunny day picnic. Instead, they’re simply verbal processors doing what they do best – thinking out loud. Far from shooting down your idea, they are meticulously dissecting it, examining all the nooks and crannies to ensure it stands strong. It’s like a quality control check for thoughts – a process that, when understood, can transform potential misunderstanding into a collaborative exploration of ideas.

Bridging the Gap: Understanding Verbal Processors in Relationships

Now, let’s switch gears and take a closer look at the challenges that verbal processors might face, especially when they’re in relationships with internal processors. Picture trying to build a bridge, but you only have half of the blueprints – that’s the feeling a verbal processor might have when they’re teamed up with an internal processor.

Think of internal processors as having thoughts that are like hidden gems, safely tucked away in the secret corners of their minds. These thinkers don’t share every twist and turn of their mental journey, making it a bit of a puzzle for the verbal processor. Imagine trying to solve a mystery without all the clues – that’s the tricky part for the talkative thinker. They might start feeling frustrated, wondering, “Why can’t they just tell me what’s going on in their head?”

It’s important to understand that internal processors aren’t trying to be mysterious on purpose; it’s just the way their brains are wired. They like to figure things out quietly inside their heads. So, the challenge here is to find common ground – imagine it like building a metaphorical bridge that connects the external and internal processing styles.

This bridge isn’t about making both thinkers the same; it’s about creating a way for them to understand each other better. It’s like finding a shared language where the talkative thinker can appreciate the value of quiet contemplation, and the quieter thinker can understand the importance of expressing thoughts out loud. It’s a bit like finding a cool middle ground where both thinkers can meet, connect, and make the bridge strong enough to support the flow of ideas between them.


Embracing the Vibrant Dance of Ideas

So, what’s the key takeaway here? Verbal processors bring a unique and vibrant flavor to the thought buffet. Their external processing style offers clarity and insight, though it comes with the potential side effect of misunderstanding. Recognizing and appreciating the verbal processors in your life can transform potential hiccups into harmonious conversations.

Next time you encounter a friend who seems to talk through every idea, remember – you’ve not stumbled upon a mere conversationalist but have secured a front-row ticket to the thought circus. Cherish the transparency, and if you happen to be a verbal processor yourself, wear your thought bubble proudly. After all, thinking out loud is not just a quirk; it’s a vibrant dance of ideas waiting to be shared with the world.


Knot Counseling Can Help!

Ready to embark on a journey of self-discovery and enhanced communication in your relationship? At Knot Counseling, we understand the importance of recognizing your processing style for meaningful connections. Our dedicated team specializes in couples counseling, guiding you through insightful conversations that can uncover your unique communication tendencies.

Discover the power of understanding whether you’re a verbal processor or not. It’s a game-changer in relationships! Knot Counseling provides a safe and supportive space where you can explore your communication dynamics, fostering deeper connections and mutual understanding.

Take the first step towards a more harmonious relationship. Schedule a couples counseling session with Knot Counseling today, and let us help you navigate the intricate landscape of your communication styles. Embrace the transformative journey of self-awareness and connection – your relationship deserves it.


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